Sadly Rosamund died on January 26^th, 2019, after her cancer returned with a vengeance just before Christmas.  We did not know that the Colintraive trip would be Rosamund’s last adventure on Milo. It was the 19^thof September and her last CT scan after chemotherapy had been clear, so we were very hopeful and already planning next year’s adventures.

Rosamund on a day out with Joanna & Vyvyan in Bristol in June 16th, 2018 and the cover of the Order of Service with a picture of Rosamund when I first met her and we used to go sailing on Cheddar Reservoir at weekends in the late 60s

The boat came out of the water at the beginning of October and we asked if she could be the last out so she could be the first in – with the full expectation that by the beginning of April we’d be heading off for that long-promised trip to the Orkneys, but it was not to be.

After a celebratory holiday together in Sicily in October and a birthday treat trip to Paris with the twins in late November and early December, Ros started to develop pains in her stomach which by January 3^rd2019 following a pre-Christmas CT scan were diagnosed as the cancer seeding in her stomach and bone.  Despite her failing body, Rosamund stoically managed to cater for nearly 20 people (with many sous-chefs helping) at Christmas at Eastcotte, but her ability to do things declined quickly and by her birthday on January 19^th she was on a morphine pump at home and was able (just) to dress up and get down one floor for a family party in her honour where everyone brought a dish.  The following week she took the decision to go for more chemotherapy that might not offer a cure but would, she hoped, extend her life for a while.  Sadly, this did not happen – she died suddenly 4 days later from a pulmonary embolism.  It was so sudden, we were talking to her one minute and the next she was gone.  It was a huge shock for all of us.  Joanna and I were with her, Julia and Nick downstairs, Andrew arriving the next morning.  In retrospect we are all pleased she did not have to suffer a long drawn out painful death.  In those last days she had been very accepting and content – we had talked about the irony of the situation – with me having had cancer for 10 years we had assumed I would go first and Rosamund would live until she was a hundred.  We did not anticipate this opposite scenario.

It is unimaginably hard to lose a loved one that you have been so close to for 52 years.  Before she died, we’d been thankful we’d been able to hold our 50^th Wedding Anniversary at Eastcotte on July 14^th, 2018 with a 100 of our close friends and family attending – we did not think it would be her last farewell, but to many it was.

The following months were taken up with organising Rosamund’s funeral which took place on March 8^th, 2019 at Canford Crematorium with a celebration of her life at The Orangery, Goldney House, Clifton afterwards.  There were many tributes and three obituaries: one published by the SS Great Britain who flew their flags at half-mast in her honour (https://www.ssgreatbritain.org/about-us/press/trust-saddened-passing-prof-ros-sutherland) ; a full obituary by the university (https://www.bristol.ac.uk/news/2019/february/ros-sutherland.html) and one published by the Guardian first on line and then later in print on May 13^th, 2019.

(https://www.theguardian.com/tone/obituaries+theguardian/series/otherlives)

SS Great Britain with flags at half mast in honour of Rosamund who was a Trustee – the picture was taken on February 2nd when Joanna and I walked down there – you can still see snow on the ground from the heavy snowfall of the previous day

Rosamund’s Obituary as it appeared in the Guardian on May 13th, 2019.  This was an amazing day for it to appear. We were not expecting it, as it had been published on-line 2 months before.  It was Rebecca’s birthday and she had written and orchestrated a lovely family tribute to Rosamund at Canford Crematorium and it was the Book Group meeting at our house where we’d set a place for Rosamund at the end of the table and it was only a half hour before everyone arrived that my cousin, Colin, called to say it was in the Guardian that day.

Rosamund will be greatly missed but I am determined to carry on our sailing adventures in Milo in her memory – this “Milosails” blog has been a testimony  to how much we have enjoyed our life together.  I’ll finish with a poem written by my mother after my father died but it still feels very poignant for me now especially when with Milo in Scotland:

 

“The scent of wood smoke in the mountain air,

The light of dawn on a lonely loch,

The path of moonlight on a silvered sea,

These things have special memories for me.

 

The skirl of pipes on a distant shore,

The hum of bees on a sunlit moor,

The swoop of gulls in sheltered bays,

These bring back memories of happier days.

 

Gone are the laughing carefree times

When life was full and loved ones near,

But life moves on and one survives

The loss of all those other lives.

 

Yet still there’s solace to be found

In the glory of the setting sun.

Life must be lived, despite the pain,

The threads picked up, the pattern weaved again.”